Wine—An Alternative History

ManInHighCastleI have long been a fan of the “Alternative History” genre of literature. Generally it is considered a sub-genre of science fiction, but it really can encompass far more than that. At its most elementary, “Alternative History” literature asks and answers the question, “What if…?”

The most common forms of this genre ask readers to consider “what if the South won the Civil War” or “What if the Third Reich prevailed in World War II”?

A new filmed version of Philip K. Dick’s classic “Man in the High Castle” is coming to the world of streaming video via Amazon Prime and this prompted me to go back and take another look at this classic. It revolves around a scenario based on the latter question posed above.

As I reviewed the plot of Dick’s work, it occurred to me that I have never seen any example of Alternative History applied to wine. That is, though I’ve read numerous novel length and short stories that fall into the alternative history literary genre, never has one dealt with wine. And it got me thinking: What would be some of the most interesting “What If” questions to apply to wine?

In a way this is a parlor game, but it’s a parlor game for those who can really wreak havoc with their imagination while at the same time exercising excellent reasoning skills.

Among the “What If” wine questions I’d like you to consider are the following:

1-What if Star Trek-like transporter technology existed whereby people and material objects could be instantaneously transported from any spot on earth to another?

2-What if the 1976 Paris Wine Tasting pitting American vs. French wines resulted in the American wines being judged inferior in every way to their French counterparts, rather than being judged their equal or better as was the case in reality?

3-What if there were an outbreak of poisoned wines that showed up on the shelves of every major U.S. city affecting wines from all over the globe and severely harming hundreds of people?

4. What if it were determined without a shadow of a doubt that by drinking 2 glasses of Pinot Noir (and only Pinot Noir) per day would provide near complete protection from inflicted by any form of cancer?

5. What if it was scientifically determined that Jesus not only did not turn water into wine but instead turned it into cider (the “hard” variety)?

The first question is particularly interesting to me. I can only imagine what it would do to the retail trade of wine. The impact transporter technology would have on wine tasting would also be profound. And consider what would happen to the wholesaler?

Would love your feedback not only on these What If questions but also hear your own What If wine questions.

 

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6 Responses

  1. Bill Haydon - November 10, 2015

    I think number three will almost certainly happen should large amounts of Chinese wine ever find its way into the global market.

  2. Tom Wark - November 10, 2015

    Bill, what makes you think that Chinese wine will end up being poisoned. Assuming it happened, however, what do you think would be the impact? Overall wine consumption decreases or just Chinese wines? If the poisoning happened in the states….that would be a different story.

    • Bill Haydon - November 10, 2015

      Tom, It won’t be deliberately poisoned, but some shortcut will be taken somewhere so that some extra money can be made, and a toxic product will enter the marketplace. That is the business culture of China.

      How many Central Americans died because of anti-freeze in the Chinese toothpaste?
      How many Chinese died because of melanin in the baby formula?
      Lead paint in the toys shipped to the US?

      Do a google search on toxic Chinese drywall shipped to America. Look into the millions of Chinese tires that were recalled when it became known that the Chinese factory had deliberately circumvented standard US safety requirements. I’ve lost track of the deadly Chinese pet food incidents over the last ten years.

      There’s a reason that American and European companies having goods manufactured there literally have to pay people to live and sleep in the factory to ensure that their “partners” don’t start slipping substandard materials in at the first opportunity.

      Here’s an NPR article on it.

      http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=11656278

      • Carl - November 11, 2015

        China dose not have a very good record with other food products such as shrimp farm raised in polluted waters, so why should we think they will do any better with wine.

  3. Jeff Kralik - November 10, 2015

    What if Robert Parker had used a different scale, say the A thru F scale, instead of the 100 point scale?

    What if the incidence of cork taint were higher, say 20% of wines were affected?

    What if, upon the repeal of Prohibition, the 21st Amendment made the Federal Government, not the individual State Governments, the regulator of all shipments of alcohol?

  4. Bob Henry - November 10, 2015

    Against my better judgment that this blog entry feels like “click bait” . . . I’ll bite.

    “2. What if the 1976 Paris Wine Tasting pitting American vs. French wines resulted in the American wines being judged inferior in every way to their French counterparts, rather than being judged their equal or better as was the case in reality?”

    A “ho-hum” continuation of the status quo.

    The French would have continued to be self-confident that no one was gaining on them (circa 1975 behavior).

    Robert Mondavi would have continued to act as Napa Valley’s tip of the spur in championing California wines.

    And Los Angeles Times wine columnist Robert Lawrence Balzer would have continued to act as California’s tip of the spur in championing our state’s wines.

    “3. What if there were an outbreak of poisoned wines that showed up on the shelves of every major U.S. city affecting wines from all over the globe and severely harming hundreds of people?”

    Recall the diethylene glycol adulteration of Austrian wines circa 1985:

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1985_diethylene_glycol_wine_scandal

    “5. What if it was scientifically determined that Jesus not only did not turn water into wine but instead turned it into cider (the “hard” variety)?’

    The Jesuits — my early mentors on wine — taught me how to turn wine into water: drink it.


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