Natural Wine Champions Deserve Some Spanking
I arrived home on my bike around 8pm, a good 2 hours later than I was told to. When asked why I was late, I told my folks that baseball practice went long. That’s what provoked the spanking. I lied to my father’s face. It wasn’t baseball practice. I just wanted to hang out at my buddy’s house, knew I didn’t have time to, did it anyway, then tried to lie my way out of it.
In most cases it doesn’t take more than one good punishment for lying to drive home the point that lying is wrong. By the time we reach adulthood, most of us know that lying is wrong and most of us don’t do it any more.
If my father were still around, he’d give Isabelle Legeron, one of the most high-profile champions of “natural wine”, a good spanking for these lies.
ON NON-“NATURAL” WINE
“Most wine today is heavily processed and made using dozens of different additives that ensure consistency and speed.”
ON THE MOTIVATIONS OF THOSE WINEMAKERS OUTSIDE THE “NATURAL WINE” FOLD
“Because the bottom line is now what the vast majority of wines is all about. It is no longer about terroir, or a sense of place, or of the land, grapes or weather, it is about producing more and more wine for less and less cash. It’s about producing it as quickly as possible and then flogging a brand illusion.”
I know that Ms. Legeron has a deep knowledge of wine and the wine industry. She’s a Master of Wine, for heaven’s sake. That’s why these entirely fabricated statements literally condemning all wine outside the “natural wine” sphere as well as their makers can’t be chalked up to ignorance. Anyone who has studied wine knows that a strong and sincere focus on terroir and minimal intervention winemaking and viticultural techniques has been at the very center of the explosion of the artisan winemaking trend that we’ve witnessed across the world over the past three or more decades. No, these are straight up fabrications of the sort that got my bottomed slapped by my father.
Unfortunately, these are the kind of lies we see coming from the champions of natural wine on a regular basis.
A good measure of spanking is in order.