When the Fox Addressed the Hens (the wine version)

“The dedicated team will be responsible for providing operational excellence, programming and promotions, digital content, category insights and performance management in the eCommerce area, across channels, as well as with online retailers and beverage alcohol delivery platforms.”

Yeah….I don’t know what that means either. However, you have to be impressed with the Southern-Glazers PR team’s ability to shove maximum jargon into a single sentence.

But that’s not what I found interesting. Southern-Glazer’s is touting “the launch of a new “Business-to-Customer eCommerce team” and whatever that means in that first paragraph is what they plan to accomplish with that team.

What’s particularly ironic is the claim that this new team is going to aid “online retailers” when Southern-Glazer’s have for the past 30 years done nothing but attempted to curtail all online sales and shipment of those sales. In those 30 years they’ve claimed kids will die, states will lose revenue, regulators will be unable to cope with hundreds of thousands of shippers, and that the earth will spin on its axis in a cataclysmic way if retailers interstate shipments are not stopped.

Now they are going to provide “operational excellence” in the service of online retailers. 

Of course they aren’t. No. Southern-Glazer’s is going to continue to pay large sums to help kill off their most annoying customers—the smaller, independent wine retailers who more and more rely on internet sales and shipping to crack a profit. They’ll do this by making every effort to convince lawmakers that interstate shipment spells the death of everything good and they’ll engage with courts to convince judges that discrimination against out-of-state retailers is exactly what the Supreme Court always meant when it wrote

“the [Dormant Commerce] Clause prohibits state discrimination against all “‘out-of-state economic interests,’” Granholm, 544 U. S., at 472 (emphasis added), and noted that the direct-shipment laws in question “contradict[ed]” dormant Commerce Clause principles because they “deprive[d] citizens of their right to have access to the markets of other States on equal terms.”

Southern Glazer’s has zero interest in aiding internet retailers (which are increasingly also brick and mortar retailers) who can only truly make internet retailing work if they can ship across state lines. As I’ve noted in the past, the surest way to kill off the small independent retailers that end up being the biggest pain in the bottom of big wholesalers is to stop retailer interstate shipments of wine. And that’s exactly what Southern-Glazer’s has and continues to try to do.

So, I’m sure all the smaller, independent wine retailers out there are looking forward to the new Southern-Glazer’s team that is embarking on providing “operational excellence” in the service of online retailers.


5 Responses

  1. VVP - December 3, 2020

    Drizly is their online “retailer”, stupid. Will you ever digest this ball?

  2. Tom Wark - December 3, 2020


    I don’t know what you look like. So I pulled out my dictionary to see if there was a picture next to the entry for “Idiot”. There was no picture. Oh well.

    Drizly and it’s like are referred to as “beverage alcohol delivery platforms”. The way I know that is that’s how Southern Glazer’s referred to them in the press release I LINKED TO IN THE POST. But you didn’t take the time to look….You Idiot.

  3. Jeff Swanson - December 3, 2020

    Obviously business has taken a hit for SGWS during the COVID pandemic. It appears they are just mining new distribution channels to gobble up.

  4. Jeremiah S. - December 3, 2020

    Ooh, I missed this place!

    Do the math. From where you stand the Liquor Outlet is 1.2 miles away. Southern-Glazer’s warehouse is 43 miles away. The closest online retailer on Drizly app for you is Pearl Specialty Market 61 mile away in Portland with 2-5 days ground shipping and extremely poor selection. It is hard for Southern-Glazer’s sales representative to drive over 100 miles just to find out what you want to be on the Liquor Outlet’s shelves. Imagine what advantage this new online integrated platform will bring in long perspective. And wolves are fed, and sheep are safe… and no discrimination. Viva smart asses!

  5. VVP - December 8, 2020

    No, Tom. Our community considers you to be the extremely rare idiot. In your poor dictionary please add your selfie next to the entry for “Idiot”. This would be much more appropriate.

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