The Theater of the Bland

I’m a father. So, believe me when I tell you that I really do have concern for the welfare of my kids, and with the ability for all kids  to interact with our culture and society safely. However, I can’t help but think that our nation’s obsession with "demon rum" too often goes over the line and just looks dumb.

In Boise, Idaho there is a movie theater that is very unique. For a long time it has offered it’s patrons the opportunity to buy a beer or glass of wine to sip while watching aliens devour humans or cowboys frolicking on a mountain. Now how cool is this?

I admit to being a popcorn and Pepsi aficionado when it comes to sitting in a theater. But, wouldn’t it be nice to slurp a beer while watching Johnny Depp do his impression of a swishy Keith Richards in "Pirates" or take in one of Scorcese’s masterpieces of mob noir?

The Idaho legislature thinks this is just do dangerous to the kids to continue to allow.

The good folk who legislate on behalf of the good folk of Idaho voted down legislation that would have formalized what has been going on at FLICKS theater for some time. The concern of course was that kids might be having at it in some dark corner:

It’s not an issue of
serving the beer or wine the problem is minors being in the same area
where the alcohol is consumed. There’s specific restrictions on minors
being at those," Lt. Bob Clements said. He’s with the Idaho State
Police Alcohol Beverage Control and worries a minor could be drinking
in a dark theater."

Unless legislation is passed, this most civilized theater in the West will be forced to only accommodate people like me: Pepsi and popcorners. It seems like such a loss when a unique approach like this is squashed in order to maintain a 100% liability free atmosphere where it concerns alcohol.

The idea that 18 year olds could not buy a beer in most states always struck me as plain dumb, considering they could also vote and lose a limb or two while fight for their country. But, I got used to this sort of thing as well as other elements of our Nanny Society. I’m just wondering if it’s in our society’s best interest to try to legislate away all risk in the pursuit of a Society of the Bland….I guess so, as long as it’s "for the children".

One Response

  1. Bradley - March 24, 2006

    Another over-the-top reaction from self-important legislators. Most underagers I associated with brought a mickey of hard stuff under their jacket and just doctored their Pepsi during the Coming Attractions. Do these people know that the kids are probably engaged in various forms of sexual activity as well? Maybe they should be under video surveillance with the house lights turned way up to help curtail all this vice.

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